Loyalty
by kyonkichi's kitten
Summary: My mandatory post-Cyberwoman fic. Warnings; Swearing, angst, suicide, hurt/comfort. Follows from just before the end of Cyberwoman.


**Here's the mandatory Cyberwoman fic.  
Warning; angst, and lots and lots of it. Also, Jack isn't exactly what one would call friendly. **

**I own nothing that you recognize.**

"Get him out of here," the command was spat from the team's leader as they watched the sobbing, shaking man kneeling next to the broken, cyberised form on the floor.

Ianto did not acknowledge the spoken command, did not interpret it as anything more than noise over the drumming of his heartbeat, as the last dregs of adrenaline escaped from his body and he collapsed, curled over Lisa's lifeless metal shell.

The rest of the team seemed to ignore the command at first. Toshiko and Owen stared, Owen's face unreadable, with Toshiko gazing at her colleague with sorrowful eyes. Gwen had turned her face, looking away as if that would protect her from witnessing the young man wracked with cries of pain and grief.

"Go!" Jack bellowed, and the group gave a start. Gwen headed towards Ianto, grabbing at his wrist and trying to get him to look at her, while Tosh ran out of the doorway. Owen leaned over to assist Gwen, by attempting to drag the dead cyberman from under the Welshman's clutches.

Ianto yelled, grasping on as tightly as possible, drowning out Gwen's attempts to comfort and silence him. Owen gave one final tug, and Ianto screamed, lashing out at the medic.

_They can't take her, she's all I have left, Lisa, Lisa, what will they do-_

The young man was cut off from his mental tirade as he was grasped from behind. Jack had grabbed the collar of his suit jacket, and a good handful of his black tie, momentarily choking him.

He didn't have to worry about being strangled, however, when a second later the immortal man had thrown him, over towards the doorway. Gwen screamed, and even Owen yelped, as he collided with the floor.

Shock overrode hurt, but it passed when ripples of pain emanated from the areas where he had landed on his front, as well as from his head from where Lisa- _no, not Lisa-_ had thrown him before.

"Get him out," Jack repeated himself, his tone clipped. He then turned back to begin picking up equipment, as Owen once again approached Ianto, who suddenly felt too exhausted to bother hitting the man.

Owen grabbed the lapels of Ianto's jacket and hoisted him to his feet, with no small amount of effort. Gwen stared at Jack, shocked by his behavior, until the older man told her to get to work taking the equipment to the incinerator.

Tosh almost ran into them at the doorway, but turned and followed them as Owen practically dragged Ianto to the main floor of the hub. Opening his medical kit that still hadn't been put away from their last Weevil-hunt, he passed the other man some painkillers, forgetting his fury with the man in order to complete his job as Torchwood Three's doctor. He then let Tosh take over the clean-up, heading back downstairs to where he knew an inconsolably furious Jack Harkness awaited him.

Ianto seemed to come back to himself as Toshiko was wiping the crimson blood from his hands, as if awaking from a dream. _Well,_ Tosh thought, _he's probably got a pretty bad concussion from today's events. _

"Tosh?" the young man inquired as she threw the cloths she had used in the bin.

"Yes, Ianto?" She responded briskly, she wasn't completely mad but she was upset about his betrayal. Trying not to let this show in her voice, she continued, "What is it?"

There was a pause where Ianto seemed to gather his thoughts, which seemed quite challenging to do. Again, he had been thrown around a lot, so she couldn't blame him.

"Lisa?" he asked softly, childishly, as though he'd woken up from a nightmare and was asking for conformation that it had all been a dream.

A new wave of pity rose in the Japanese girl, and she gently ran her hand through his fine hair, as though petting him.

"Come on," she told him, "I'll take you home."

When Jack had told them to get Ianto out of the room, it was as though the unspoken command had been for them to put him in the conference room or Jack's office for him to deal with.

However, as the instruction was simply 'to get him out', Tosh figured she could risk the consequences based on a technicality. There was no way she would leave her friend-_ not a friend, _she noted, but quickly pushed that thought back down and metaphorically sat on it- for Jack to deal with while the immortal was so angry.

Ianto seemed to have no problem with this- _actually, he seems to have no problem with anything right now-_ so she led him out of the cog door entrance and to her car, driving him home.

When she reached the sparse flat that he used to store his items in, that Toshiko bet he never actually slept or eat in, she took the keys from his waist pocket, opened the door and let him in, following to make sure he didn't pass out on the floor.

He didn't even seem to recognize the place, simply falling onto the moss-green couch and curling up into a ball. Tosh shut the door behind her, placed his keys in the convenient bowl on the end table in the hallway, and followed him. She winced as she saw the blood-stained clothes begin to mark his couch, the once-immaculate suit still wet with the blood of his girlfriend and the completely innocent pizza delivery girl.

Tugging on his arm, she managed to rouse him enough to tell him to go into the bedroom and change, and he followed her suggestions without complaint, falling into the single bed that waited for him, unmade, and falling straight back asleep.

Tosh stood in the middle of the flat, not knowing what to do next. She supposed that she could go back to work and help clean up, but she didn't particularly want to leave Ianto on his own, especially with a high risk of concussion. One selfish little side of her niggled at the rest, chiding her with the fact that she couldn't handle going back and seeing the wreckage. She didn't care.

It had been about an hour since they had collectively shot the Cyberwoman in front of Ianto, she guessed, not actually knowing the time. The innocent green lights that showed the time on the digital clock that was fixed to the microwave was several hours out, judging by the fact that it said 1pm, when dawn had not yet broken. She sat awkwardly on the couch, avoiding the bloodstains, glancing at the room around her. It was empty of personal belongings, sparse except for the couch, dining table and four chairs.

As if sensing her boredom, her mobile phone buzzed, and she answered it quickly, not wanting to wake Ianto.

"Toshiko s-"

"Tosh? Where are you? Where's Ianto?" Jack demanded, cutting her off.

"We're at his apartme-"

"What are you doing there? He's-"

"Sleeping, Jack. He's asleep. And unless you lower your voice so that I don't have to yell to be heard, it will stay that way."

There was silence for a moment on the other end of the line.

"I'm coming over. You can go home." He told her, dismissing her. She didn't want to be dismissed.

"Jack, I-"

"I need to speak to Ianto." Jack's tone, rather than angry, seemed resigned.

"Can't it-"

"Wait?" Jack laughed, though there was no humor there. "No, Tosh, this has to be dealt with now."

"Fine," she said through gritted teeth. She slid her phone shut, glared at it for a minute, and then headed in to Ianto's bedroom.

He wasn't asleep, as she had thought he was. Instead, he clutched at the pillow, his head resting on the mattress. She saw the teeth marks in his arms from where he must have tried to muffle the sounds that accompany the tears that she saw had streaked his face.

Pity swelled again. Leaning forwards, she ran her palm over his cheek, wiping off some of the salt water that had gathered. He turned, as if noticing her for the first time, but not caring.

"Thanks, Tosh," he mumbled against his arm.

"Don't thank me, Ianto. Jack's on his way," she warned him, and he tensed, then sat upright quickly, throwing his legs over the side of the bed, nearly kicking her.

"I have to… I have to-" he panicked, and she put her hand on his shoulder reassuringly.

"Ianto, you'll be fine. I have to go now, but don't worry too much. I understand. Really. I know what people will do for love. So does Jack. I'm sure you'll be okay." She took her hand away, as their eyes met for the first time that night.

"Goodbye, Toshiko Sato." Ianto dismissed her, standing up and heading into the adjoining bathroom.

She wondered for a moment at the use of her full name, but shrugged it off, heading out the front door. She left it unlocked, so that Jack would hopefully open it rather than kicking it down.

In the bathroom, Ianto stared at his appearance, wondering when he had become so thin. The coffee and biscuit diet wasn't really substituting real food, he acknowledged. His pyjama top hung off of him, and the tracksuit pants were a little baggy, but he didn't really care anymore. The shadow that had grown over his face was ignored, as he opened his cabinet, searching for what he needed.

Heading into the kitchen, he rifled through the barely-stocked cupboard, attempting to recall which one that he had placed the liquor in. Finding it under the microwave, he grinned to himself, a ghastly representation of a smile that he hadn't pulled in over a year, and twisted the lid on one of the full bottles open.

He heard the banging of fists- or was it a boot?- on his front door just as he had taken the first few gulps from the bottle of scotch. Ignoring it, knowing that his boss would kick the door in before he even got there to answer it, he sat on the top of his kitchen bench, waiting.

Ianto felt momentary surprise as Jack sauntered into the kitchen, not having heard the door crash to the floor. _Tosh must have left the door unlocked_, he mentally commented.

Jack's figure, whether he was angry or in a good mood, was one that filled a room and changed its atmosphere. And Ianto could feel the quiet anger radiating from him, bouncing from the walls and circling around, but he could also feel the even quieter sadness that lay in Jack, buried very deep.

"So," Jack began, his voice several decibels louder than Ianto felt the situation called for.

"So," he responded, much more quietly but no less confident.

"Tell me, Ianto Jones, since when has it been appropriate to hide dangerous people or objects in bases where they could take over and destroy the world?"

Ianto grimaced. No small talk, then. He took a larger swig from the bottle.

"Oh, no response? So you obviously knew what you were doing was wrong right from the beginning."

"Shut up, Harkness," Ianto groaned, closing his eyes. They flew open again as Jack launched a glass from the counter across the room, a meter away from Ianto. He ignored the shrapnel that ricocheted back and embedded itself into his skin.

"You hid a _fucking _Cyberman in my _basement!"_ Jack yelled. Ianto shut his eyes again, but nodded his agreement.

"You betrayed me, and the team." Jack's tone was cold now, none of the earlier passion breaking through into his words. Ianto nodded again.

Jack was silent for a minute, then asked, in a wounded, yet still slightly angry, tone, "Why?"

Ianto opened his eyes again, looked into Jack's gaze, and knew he had to answer honestly.

"I love her."

"Loved," Jack corrected. Ianto looked down at the ground, willing tears not to leak from his eyes. Apathy wasn't working too well for him. He went with the next best thing, and took a long drink from the bottle next to him.

"So you found someone who was worth destroying all of Planet Earth for?" Jack commented, snidely.

"Yes," Ianto said simply.

It was Jack's turn to look down at his feet. Silence reigned, and Ianto continued to drink until Jack finally broke the quiet atmosphere.

"You've had enough of that," he muttered, grabbing the bottle from Ianto's grip. He was too tired, too mentally and physically exhausted to stop him.

"So what now?" Ianto asked, slipping down from the counter, heading over to his couch. Jack followed him, but didn't sit, just stayed standing over Ianto as he lay down.

"Now… well, you know protocol better than anyone. What am I supposed to do with you?"

"Kill me." Ianto stated, not seeming to care anymore. The older man looked down at him with surprise.

"Surely you know that, Jack?"

"I…" the immortal trailed off. He knew that, but he didn't want to carry it out, because despite the betrayal that Ianto had caused, he still felt a stab of pain twisting in his chest at the idea of losing him, especially now that the adrenaline had worn off.

"That, or RetCon me back about five years. That would work just as effectively." Ianto held an arm over his eyes to shield the light from the lamp.

Jack's world seemed to crash as he sat down on the floor next to Ianto. Minutes ago, he'd wanted the man dead, but now, the idea seemed appalling to him. Here was this bright spark, clever, intuitive, and he definitely knew that at least some of the flirting hadn't simply been to distract the captain from… Ianto's cyber-girlfriend. Death wasn't an option.

But that left RetCon, and he didn't want to do that either, so what could he do?

"What am I going to do with you, Jones, Ianto Jones?" Jack sighed, resting his chin on his hands, and his elbows on his knees.

"Better decide quickly, before I do it for you," Ianto mumbled sleepily, his words distorted.

"What?" Jack demanded. "What do you mean?"

"I'd say, ten minutes left."

Horror struck Jack as he glanced at the bottle of scotch that he'd left on the counter. But that wouldn't…

"Shit!" He cursed, something he rarely did, leaping from his seat and heading into the bathroom. He tore open cupboard doors, searching through shelves, ripping open boxes of medicine and drugs that could have possibly been used.

The innocuous-looking packed of high-strength codeine tablets, designed to be a good pain-reliever, was empty, the silver capsule holder in the middle still in the box. He wasn't completely sure if he'd taken the whole lot that night, but knew he'd taken at least some, because it was only in the wrong state of mind that Ianto would ever put an empty packet back into the box. Shaking his head, Jack flew back into the lounge room, where Ianto appeared to have fallen asleep, in a drug/concussion induced coma, most likely.

Panicking, Jack grabbed the young man off the couch and raced out of the front door, not bothering to lock it. Piling him into the SUV, and stuffing a seatbelt in around him, and kissing his forehead quickly, he leapt into the front seat and drove.

While it would have been ideal to head back to their headquarters, Jack knew that the equipment Owen had would not be particularly useful in helping to save Ianto, so Jack headed for the hospital, tires screeching as he flew around corners.

Phoning ahead had seemed like a good idea at the time, but his concentration was lacking so it was a very short conversation with one of the hospital's receptionists. However, he hoped he'd conveyed enough for them to understand.

This was shown as he pulled up to an abrupt halt at the emergency exit, only to find a stretcher waiting for Ianto to go on, accompanied by two nurses. It was obviously a quiet night for emergencies.

Running to keep up with the stretcher, he hoped to everything that existed that Ianto had been wrong time-wise, because it had been a fifteen-minute journey.

Despite his status as Torchwood's leader, and being above the law, he was still refused access to the operating room that Ianto was wheeled into. Angrily, he slammed his fist against the wall, before slumping with his back against it.

That night had been a real whirlwind of emotion, for him, Ianto, and the rest of the team.

Jack jolted as he remembered Toshiko, Owen and Gwen, two of whom he was sure would be worried about his wellbeing. Flipping open his mobile, he sent a quick message to each of them, having sent them home after the clean-up. Then he settled down for the wait.

It couldn't have been long- possibly ten minutes- before Toshiko and Owen had raced through the hallways to find Jack, and fifteen for Gwen, and soon the four of them were sitting outside of the operating room on the floor, each one having demanded access, and having been denied.

The group sat in silence, waiting for one of the doctors to walk out and update them. Which, sure enough, took about an hour, but it did eventually happen.

Jack was the first to leap up, followed by Gwen, then the other two as the doctor, wearing scrubs, walked from the room. They hadn't even had a chance to speak before he was telling them the good- or bad- news.

"We've managed to pump most of the drugs out of his system. He'll survive," and after that, nobody really listened to the rest of the explanation, until they heard the words "Concussion," and "Staying for a few nights, but should wake up soon."

Jack grinned at the team as Tosh and Gwen hugged, and Owen looked relieved. He'd be okay. He'd survive.

Funny, how only a couple of hours ago they'd all been so furious with him.

Ianto was taken into a ward that had only one other person in it, who didn't mind them stealing all of the room's chairs to crowd around the sleeping man's bed. Jack had to wonder who would be the first to bring up the night's events.

Gwen was the first to speak.

"I don't blame him," she murmured, gazing over at him like a mother would her child.

The others gave a start- they hadn't really expected anyone to talk so soon.

"Neither do I…" Toshiko said, very slowly and carefully, "Although he is going to get one hell of a talking to from me about this." Owen nodded.

"I still hate the tosser," he growled, "but I get it. I would have done the same." he admitted quietly.

Jack watched his team try to repair the damage dealt from the previous events. Trust would be hard to give back to Ianto, but he mostly agreed with what the others said. He had done much worse himself, and Ianto only had the best of intentions at heart.

All four of them jumped as Ianto mumbled, semi-conscious.

"Hate y' too, Ow'n," the speech was muffled by the pillow he had turned his face into, but audible enough for everyone to hear it. Blue eyes flickered open, and the young man turned to face his wide-eyed audience.

"You-" Jack began, but Toshiko got there first, slapping Ianto on the arm, none-too-gently.

"You idiot!" She cried, and her tears started up again. "We all thought you were going to die!"

"Well," Ianto gasped as he struggled to sit up, and regain a little dignity, "That was the plan."

Everyone had known of his intentions, but hearing him say them out loud hit a little too close to each person's heart, particularly Jack.

For that comment, Ianto received a hard slap around the head, this time from Gwen, before being wrapped in the woman's embrace gently. He looked over her shoulder at Jack, a question in his eyes.

Ianto didn't understand. What was their problem? A minute ago, they'd all wanted him dead, or worse, and all of a sudden they were being affectionate! He couldn't get it. _I took away the choice for Jack. He had to choose, to kill me, or to RetCon me. I made it easy. Then the stupid bastard had to go pulling me back. There's no point after… now Lisa's gone, why do I have to stay? _But he knew the answer to that already. Here he was, surrounded by five people who he knew cared about him, in their own way. It was by his choice that they ignored him- he chose to slip into the wallpaper, to be ignored.

As if sensing what lines he was thinking along, Jack informed him, "There's always a third option."

He looked up as Gwen slipped back into her seat.

"Live. Live and cope. Show that dedication, that loyalty, to us. To Torchwood. " As though he didn't care for Ianto's opinion on the subject, he stood up to leave.

"You have four weeks. Go and visit the family that I know you erased from your files. Buy some new furniture. Attend therapy sessions. At the end of four weeks, I'll be back for you. You'd better be ready." With that, and a quick drop of a kiss on the top of the young man's head, Jack Harkness strode from the room.


End file.
